Forced To Go To A Brewery To Marry Sinead and Colm!


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Those of you who know me well will know that I am a bit of a beer fanatic so when Sinéad and Colm asked if I would marry them at the West Brewery in Glasgow I jumped at the opportunity. They looked at me strangely and asked if I wanted to more about their plans.  I said, “more?” somewhat hesitantly and they explained that theirs was to be a small family affair because they originally came from Ireland and not all of their families would be able to travel for their big day. They also wanted it to include a cup of tea, oh and some readings in Irish. “OK”, I said again somewhat hesitantly, “a  cup of tea?” “Yes”‘ they said and looked at me expectantly. “Right, you want to include a cup of tea in your wedding ceremony? For yourselves or for everyone?” “Oh, don’t be silly, just for ourselves.” At this point, to be honest, I felt myself slipping inexorably into an episode of Father Ted that I had never seen so I said “oh, right then, that’ll be fine” and clapped my hands in that Father Ted way.

cs-wedding-bw007So, come the big day and everyone gathered in the brewery, well, when I say everyone I am including about half of the population of Glasgow because they don’t close the brewery restaurant just for a wedding. We gathered in the small side room for the ceremony and began, of course, with a Band Warming. Thought originally to come from Ireland it is a lovely way to include everyone present in your ceremony as they pass your rings amongst them and wish you happiness.

We then had a reading from Rosie and Aileen who read “Hero and lover and the heart of Ireland” by Aonghas MacNeacail.

A race was once organised between the young maidens of Ireland, their goal was the summit of sliabh na mban (the mountain of the women) where one of ireland’s legendary heros awaited them as prize. The woman of his own choice being among them he told her the shortest route to ensure her victory.

 If I were on the summit of sliabh na mban

Waiting

I would whisper for you the shortest way

 

Laoch is leannan is cridhe eirinn

Nan robh mise air bhar sliabh na mban

A’feitheamh

Chagrainn dhuts’ an rathad gear

But what about the cup of tea I hear you ask. well, here is how we included the moment in the ceremony:

We have another short ceremony to perform and I thought that this might be the perfect time for it. Drinking from a Quaich is part of the ancient tradition of hospitality from the Celtic honour system – whoever had shared a cup could not do injury to the other, hence the term “loving cup”. It Is usual to drink whisky from a Quaich, however, Sinéad and Colm are going to make each other a cup of tea. Everyone has their own specific way to drink tea… strong, weak, middling. Whole milk, semi-skimmed, sugar or sweetener. In rural Ireland it is almost a way of telling the time. Tea with breakfast, tea with lunch, 3 o’clock tea, after dinner and maybe a cup somewhere in between if it’s needed. Tea is to comfort and celebrate and to focus on the moments in the day. It is almost a moment of meditation. And Sinéad and Colm will continue to share pots, mugs and cups of tea with each other into the future more than likely every day.

They served each other a cup of tea and sat down. I sat on a stool, very Dave Allan style, and began. “When I first meet a couple I am to marry I ask them to do some homework for me, tell me their story and their hopes and dreams for their marriage ….”

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The Glorious Prestonfield House in December


I was asked to conduct three intimate marriages at the Prestonfield House Hotel in November and December and I must admit I think it is the perfect winter venue for a small wedding. The largest of the weddings had 12 guests and the smallest 6 and they were all held in the beautiful Leather Room with its wood and leather panelling and roaring log fire. I cannot praise the staff at the Prestonfield enough. The service is faultless from the moment you arrive and nothing is too much trouble (see my Blog about moving the ceremony outdoors).

Alan and Joan got married on the 25th November. Alan is an artist and the two of them work at the College of Art so the wedding had some style to it, to say the least. I always suggest that you should include some music as your guests wait for the arrival of the bride and Joan chose the soundtrack to the film Emilie and then entered to Song of the Siren by the Czars, what else.
They also selected a reading that was unfamiliar to me. It is from “Gift From The Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh:

A good relationship has a pattern like a dance and is built on some of the same rules.
The partners do not need to hold on tightly, because they move confidently in the same pattern, intricate but gay and swift and free, like a country dance of Mozart’s.
To touch heavily would be to arrest the pattern and freeze the movement, to check the endless changing beauty of its unfolding. There is no place here for the possessive clutch, the clinging arm, the heavy hand; only the barest touch in passing.
Now arm in arm, now face to face, now back to back – it does not matter which.

Because they know they are partners moving to the same rhythm, creating a pattern together, and being invisibly nourished by it. 

By the time Sam and Jemma got married on the 21st December the Christmas decorations were of course on display and the Leather Room became even more enchanting. It always wonderful to bump into old friends and amongst their guests were Graeme and Jo (Sam’s sister) whom I married on the 25th November 2011 with their little one.

As revenge for the reading she made her do at her wedding Gemma asked Jo to read I Love You:

I love you
Not only for what you are,
But for what I am
When I am with you.
I love you,
Not only for what
You have made of yourself,
But for what
You are making of me.
I love you because you
Are helping me to make
Of the lumber of my life
Not a tavern
But a temple.
Out of the works
Of my every day
Not a reproach
But a song.
I love you
Because you have done
More than any creed
Could have done
To make me good.
And more than any fate
Could have done
To make me happy.
You have done it
Without a touch,
Without a word,
Without a sign.
You have done it
By being yourself.
Perhaps that is what
Being a friend means,
After all.

Ben, the ultimate ring bearer!