The Glorious Blair Castle with Jojo and Chris

On By @humanistbrianIn Blair CastleLeave a comment

Just up the road is one of the most stunning wedding venues in Scotland, the home of the Duke of Atholl, the only person with a private army in Britain. It is Blair Castle. Set in its own magnificent estate, surrounded by “Big Trees” as we call them up here (trees collected last century by plant hunters mainly in North America) it is your archetypical Scottish Victorian baronial pile and filled with all the history you could ever want (mainly guns, guns and more guns. Oh, and swords).

Jojo and Chris’s wedding was the poshest of posh affairs. The majority of the men wore their trews or kilts with black tie and the women were in their finery – though none could eclipse Jojo.

I mean look at the antlers on the walls

The page boys entered before the stunning bridesmaids and the Jojo and her Dad. We began the ceremony with a Band Warming where the rings are passed amongst the guests and then opened with Bruce and holly absolutely nailing I’ll Be There By Louise Cuddon

I’ll be there, my darling, through thick and through thin.
When your mind’s in a mess and your head’s in a spin.
When your plane’s been delayed, and you’ve missed the last train.
When life is just threatening to drive you insane.
When your thrilling whodunit has lost its last page.
When somebody tells you, you’re looking your age.
When your coffee’s too cool, and your wine is too warm.
When the forecast said, “Fine,” but you’re out in a storm.
When your quick break hotel, turns into a slum.
And your holiday photos show only your special thumb.

When you park for five minutes in a resident’s bay.
And return to discover you’ve been towed away.
When the jeans that you bought in hope or in haste.
Just stick on your hips and don’t reach round your waist.
When the food you most like brings you out in red rashes.
When as soon as you boot up the bloody thing crashes.
So my darling, my sweetheart, my dear…
When you break a rule, when you act the fool.
When you’ve got the flu, when you’re in a stew.
When you’re last in the queue, don’t feel blue.
’cause I’m telling you, I’ll be there.

We had a great laugh at their story of how the two of them got together and embarrassed a few of their friends in the process. The highlight of the story was the 80 year old stranger in a south London pub told Chris that “she is a keeper” and persuaded him to ask Jojo to marry him..

We even had a random sing song with the bridesmaids leading all the guests. Just brilliant!

Well you’ve got to have a laugh haven’t you?

On The Beach Opposite Skye with Dougie and Eilidh

On By @humanistbrianIn Camusdarach BeachLeave a comment

Some requests to conduct a wedding ceremony are just irresistible.

In the section marked location was the following “on a beach near Arisaig”. Mind you, that was three years ago and this was the third rescheduling of the date but we made it. So turning left off the Glenfinnan to Mallaig road, down through the campsite to park in a field and then through the dunes towards the sound of the best piper I have ever heard. You see, years ago, many years ago, Dougie was the lead piper with the Red Hot Chilli Pipers so any piper at his wedding was going to have to be better than good. Most of the rest of the original band were there as well all milling about, moving chairs and sorting stuff out.

Guests arrived, tramping through the dunes and then we waited for Eilidh and her bridesmaids. They were late. Of course. It is the bride’s prerogative after all.

Eilidh’s brother Donnie read for us.

“All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.”

We had a Handfasting and we drank from a Quaich.

It was magic.

The Best Wee Wedding Of The Year With Jamie Lee and Paul

On By @humanistbrianIn St Anthony's ChapelLeave a comment

Wee weddings have been a way of life throughout the pandemic. During lockdown a wee wedding consisted of only five people, and that included me. The logistics of this mean that I had to get out the way to let the photographer do her work.

It is a great honour when you get to marry your friends and I have known Jamie Lee and Paul for what seems like centuries. We met, not too frequently, in Paul’s Mum and Dad’s pub, The Corbie Inn in Bo’ness and we already have the return match pencilled in for 2022 in the Corbie Inn – that will be a party and a half

The wedding venue was the incredible St Anthony’s Chapel in Holyrood Park and that is north Edinburgh and Leith stretching away in the back ground.

The witnesses were the two Mums, both looking very lovely. I was going to run a a competition to see if you could spot which Mum was which, but I think that would be too easy.

A wee wedding ceremony is very simple although we did have a wee laugh about how they first met before they exchanged promises and then their legal vows. Quite emotional actually.

So, a lovely, breezy day and I am really looking forward to conducting a full celebration next year. Isn’t she beautiful?

To The Trossachs with Alister and Michelle

On By @humanistbrianIn Venachar LochsideLeave a comment

When they first approached me and explained they wanted an outdoor wedding in November frankly I thought they were insane but Michelle and Alister were insistent, “It will be fine!” became the motto of the day. The venue was a new one for me as well – Loch Venachar Lochside, and a new venue always intrigues me so I shrugged my shoulders and said, “What could possibly go wrong?”

As it transpired it was much better than “fine”. They were so lucky, the day dawned cloudless but cold. The drive down along Loch Tay, through Killin and down to the Trossachs was just sensational and to find the venue just turn right at the real ale shop, which I visited on the way back of course.

A family affair

It was second time around for them and for their extra special day they were joined by Michelle’s daughters, our bridesmaids Kirsten and Louissa and by Alister’s sons, Struan and Ruaridh our best men. Michelle had lived for many years in Athens so they were joined by a very international group of guests from Greece, Greece via New York and by one well-travelled family who joined us from Greece via Stenhousemuir. The venue was not very large and all the guests seemed to know one another so for me it a bit like being a guest at a private party but it was a great atmosphere.

Michelle did warn me that she would arrive around 1-ish and that she was not the most punctual of people. I think it was 1.45 when she arrived, much to the relief of all involved including me.

  • Needless to say we had a bit of a laugh. Well Alister did!
  • We had a Hand Fasting
  • I don’t think sharing some cake was part of the ceremony but who cares?

It was very much their day and very much their ceremony. It was so personal and the two of them were such hopeless romantics it was wonderful. I am sure they won’t mind me sharing this piece from their homework, it is something every single one of us should recall every day:

“But now they have found each other and that finding is too nice for them to let go. They have been alone for so long that the simplest acts of kindness have profound meaning – making each other a cup of coffee; hanging up the washing; going to the shop in the rain when they’ve run out of milk; hugs after a hard day at the office. These moments are the very essence of love and they promise that they will never take them for granted again.”

Alister wrote to me afterwards:

“Our wedding day was wonderful and when we think of it – the sunshine, the laughter, the love and the fun – Brian is right at the heart of our memories. He’s warm and humourous and engaging and our guests loved him. We loved him too and he made everything about the ceremony so special for us. He spent time with us in advance to learn our story and used it to shape the ceremony and make it unique and personal to us; he created a special atmosphere right from the start, making everyone laugh and share our happiness; and his words and approach to the celebration captured the spirit of our love for each other perfectly. Marriage is a happy occasion and Brian picks up that happiness and shapes it into something extraordinary that everyone is a part of. Our day was perfect.”

An amazing day with Ashton and David

On By @humanistbrianIn CottiersLeave a comment

I first met Ashton 10 years ago when my daughter moved into her halls of residence. I’m sure I met him that day but the two of them have remained the very best of friends (she is one of the groom maids, if that’s a word) and Ashton and I have bumped into each other on numerous occasions, including, most recently, seeing Annie Lennox (we are both her biggest fans). But it was about three years earlier, on the 19th December 2016 that I received a message from Ashton asking if I might be able to marry him and David. It took me all of two seconds to say “yes”, mainly because I was utterly speechless. What an honour. Between then and their wedding day we have met many times and used a few of them to plan their wonderful ceremony at one of my favourite venues, The Cottiers in Glasgow. The Cottiers is one of the most theatrical venues in the city and ideally suited to the marriage of the ex-President of the university Musical Theatre Society.

I guess you’ve already worked out that the ceremony was something special. We laughed and we cried, well David did, had some wonderful readings, a Hand Fasting, we shared a Quaich, Hannah sang beautifully and it was just the most emotional day imaginable. Their story was like a fairytale. It was really love at first sight, David admitted in his homework that, “from that first moment I knew he was right for me.” This photo from the ceremony captures the moment when I talked about their first date quoting from Ashton’s homework, “he arrived at my flat with a bottle of wine and a monkey onesie under his clothes, and we watched Death Becomes Her”

When David admitted that Death Becomes Her was his second favourite musical-in-a-movie after Beaches they both knew that that was the moment.

Let me finish with a reading from a book that captures a generation, that pre-dates Harry Potter, The Amber Spyglass by Philip Pullman. It was read by Justine and she absolutely nailed it:

I will love you forever; whatever happens. Till I die and after I die, and when I find my way out of the land of the dead, I’ll drift about forever, all my atoms, till I find you again… I’ll be looking for you, every moment, every single moment. And when we do find each other again, we’ll cling together so tight that nothing and no one’ll ever tear us apart. Every atom of me and every atom of you… We’ll live in birds and flowers and dragonflies and pine trees and in clouds and in those little specks of light you see floating in sunbeams… And when they use our atoms to make new lives, they won’t just be able to take one, they’ll have to take two, one of you and one of me.

Ashton and David sent me a note:

There was no other option for us for who should officiate on our wedding day (and not just because Brian’s daughter is one of our closest friends!) – Brian was organised, super helpful and full of great tips to help us make our ceremony meaningful. He was fantastic at keeping our guests informed as to what was happening during the ceremony itself and wove our personal stories together to create what really was an unforgettable celebration.

A Very French Ocassion with Jennifer and Louis

On By @humanistbrianIn Craiganour LodgeLeave a comment

This is my new home – Perthshire. On the left is Schiehallion and on the right is Loch Tummel taken from the door of our venue for today Craiganour Lodge where it was Jennifer and Louis’s big day. It was Wendy from Utopia Scotland who got touch with me to help Jennifer and Louis from France have their dream wedding in Scotland.The two of them proved to be great fun and we had quite a giggle over Skype as we put they ceremony together, mainly laughing at my appalling French.

Craganour Lodge is one of many highland lodges scattered around this part of the country. Usually part of a large estate they are used chiefly for hunting and fishing parties. But they are not used all the time and they do make the most amazing intimate wedding venue.

As you can see the venue dictates a much more relaxed and informal approach to a wedding especially when you consider that there were only a dozen or so guests. The ceremony itself was a blend of Scottish and French. We shared two delicious poems in French, read by their best friends, we had a Hand Fasting and the Louis cried and sobbed his way through his beautiful French promises. I will share Jennie’s with you here:

“Je te promets de t’aimer, de veiller sur toi et de t’offrir chaque jour le meilleur de moi-même. Je te promets de t’offrir ce quotidien créatif et amoureux dont on rêve ensemble et de continuer à vivre et à voyager de façon imprévisible. Je te promets de continuer à te surprendre comme tu aimes si bien, parce que ton bonheur est important pour moi.”

The star of the show and of course my new best friend was Jennie’s gorgeous daughter Valentine, a little charmer. It was difficult to say goodbye after such an emotional day. To be honest, I still miss them all.

Olivia and Ryan – The Wedding Of The Year

On By @humanistbrianIn Inverlochy CastleLeave a comment

From my new base in Highland Perthshire I can tell already that I am going to be working with some amazing people at some amazing venues. Big call out to Emma @timelesswhite for organising this amazing extravaganza.

The bride and groom’s photo shoot was before the ceremony

Olivia and Ryan both came from the USA and they lived in Chicago so all of the preparation was done via Skype and email. As I arrived at the amazing Inverlochy Castle I could see them in one of the fields with the Craig and Eva getting their photos done. Photos before the ceremony? All will become clear.

To say that Ryan loves Scotland would be an understatement, he owns three kilts, which is two more than me, though obviously he only wears one at a time. At Olivia’s insistence, sorry suggestion, the wedding ceremony was to be held outside at sunset in November – in Scotland! Was she mad?

  • Yes, that is Ben Nevis

No. she was just incredibly lucky.

The ceremony was beautiful if a bit chilly around the knees. We shared a Quiche including the grooms superb choice of whisky but the best bit in the whole ceremony was a gag played on Ryan by Olivia. It is so American that I don’t really understand it but all the guests fell out of their seats laughing, so it went well. Anyway, Olivia had Ryan’s ring made especially with gem stones inside the band and she chose the gemstones to symbolise key aspects of Ryan’s life and their marriage. I introduced it innocently as follows: “On the inside it has four sets of gemstones: The first is a sapphire surrounded by two peridots (her birthstone surrounded by his birthstone) to symbolize his love surrounding her, then a peridot surrounded by two sapphires to symbolize her love surrounding him , then a diamond surrounded by two sapphires to symbolize Scotland and this amazing wedding day and finally, a burnt orange stone set beside a maroon ruby to symbolize the combining of your alma matters into one household as you begin your marriage ” The joke was that burnt orange is the colour of Olivia’s school her alma matar, a rival to Ryan’s and he HATES and I mean HATES it and all that it symbolises. And that’s true, as I read this out I thought he was going to have a stroke! I got a standing ovation when I said “only joking” – it’s all in the timing.

Emma and I had decided that not would be far too cold to sign the paperwork outside so we retired to the dining room to sign the schedule.

An amazing day with an amazing couple and their families, just joyful.

Katie and Craig at Comrie Croft

On By @humanistbrianIn Comrie CroftLeave a comment

You may have noticed that I haven’t posted anything for ages. That’s because in May I moved right to the other end of the country, to Aberfeldy. I thought this would be an appropriate post to begin my new life as this is going to be one of my local venues from now on – the glorious Comrie Croft.

©Fraser Stewart

Family and friends had joined them from all over the world because the two of them had travelled when they first met and had spent time in Asia and Australia, proving their love for one another touring the latter in a camper van. As I said during the ceremony “if that isn’t true love I don’t know what is”.

©Fraser Stewart

The sun shone and we had a right laugh as you can see. I suspect that the party afterwards would have been a complete riot. We had a Hand Fasting and we shared a Quaich but I must admit that the highlight was a reading that I hadn’t heard before (as a reading) and Holly, who read it, completely nailed Leonard Cohen’s Dance Me To The End Of Love. I share only two verses here – go look it up:

Dance me to the wedding now,
dance me on and on Dance me very tenderly and dance me very long
We’re both of us beneath our love, we’re both of us above
Dance me to the end of love
Dance me to the end of love

Dance me to the children who are asking to be born
Dance me through the curtains that our kisses have outworn
Raise a tent of shelter now, though every thread is torn
Dance me to the end of love

We cheered and clapped the happy couple.

©Fraser Stewart

A Very Aussie Occasion at Bachilton Barn

On By @humanistbrianIn Bachilton BarnLeave a comment

I do find it strange when the first time you meet a couple is at their wedding but sometimes it’s just not possible to meet-up beforehand so everything is planned over Skype. As Catriona and Hok live on The Gold Coast in Australia there were many Skype calls and many emails as we put their ceremony together. But the day arrived and I scuttled down the road to Bachilton Barn on a slightly breezy day, as you can see. I arrived early secure in the knowledge that I would recognise Catriona (the one in the fancy white dress!) but Hok? Fortunately he dashed across and introduced himself and then all his groomsmen.

The ceremony was outside and we survived the wind but I do remember that keeping Catriona’s veil secure was a challenge. We even had a song and all sang Stand By Me, which was great. Their stories were hilarious but the best bit was when they read their promises to each other. Promises that they had kept secret until that moment. Not a dry eye in the house.

To end Lisa came forward and read the delightful Realistic Wedding Poem:

Marriage is a journey, and not just a destination
That goes far beyond this wedding, this public celebration.
This is just the beginning of a path we’ll travel together
With obstacles to overcome, and possible storms to weather.

One day we’ll sit side by side, hands withered and bent
Thinking back over the years, the good times we have spent.
We’ll remember the laughs. We’ll recall special places
And look far beyond the greyed hair and softly lined faces.

So let’s take it all in and cherish each day
No matter what happens, no matter what’s thrown our way.
We’re both realistic. Every day won’t be a dream
But we’re in this together, because we make a cracking team!

Yes, It Is Glamis Castle! Maxine and Tracy’s Big Day

On By @humanistbrianIn UncategorizedLeave a comment

What an absolute delight! It was a truly gorgeous, wonderful day when Tracy and Maxine got married at one of the most beautiful venues in Scotland. The two of them were great fun to work with, we had an absolute ball.

Their ceremony was in the tiny basement that only holds around 50 people so intimate was the word for it and their friends and family were very much a part of their big day. Tracy’s brother Mark began proceedings with a reading by Mark Twain:

‘A Marriage’

This will be the mightiest day in the history of our lives,
For it makes of two fractional lives a whole,
It gives to two purposeless lives a work,
And doubles the strength of each to perform it.
It gives to two questioning natures a reason for living,
And something to live for;
It will give a new gladness to the sunshine,
A new fragrance to the flowers,
A new beauty to the earth,
And a new mystery to life.

Their ceremony was hilarious with more puns per line than I ever thought possible. They then presented their respective mothers-in-law to-be with flowers before exchanging their pledges to one another. There honestly wasn’t a dry eye in the room and I have to share them with you all:

Maxine:

“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows,
But you can be my wingman anytime.
When I first saw your face, I thought the sun rose in your eyes.
I knew I’d found that somewhere, over the rainbow,
Where blue birds fly and dreams really do come true.
No measure of time with you would be long enough,
But let’s start with forever.
Come what may, I will love you until my dying day.”

Tracy:

“To me you are perfect.
I felt it early on, this was the beginning of something special.
I’ll always remember that text you sent.
“I like your fire, but keep a handle on those flames,” it read.
You know I have a tendency to get over excited.
But you were my destiny and I felt the force.
I love you more than I have ever found a way to say.
I love you, and that’s the beginning and end of everything.”

Aren’t they wonderful? Oh, you may wonder what Tracy is doing with a cardboard cutout Elvis. Well, theirs was an Elvis themed reception so the King had to appear at the castle as well, didn’t he?

Thanks for the message Maxine and Tracy, “Working with Brian was so easy, his guidance in helping us to create our perfect ceremony was invaluable and as a result, we ended up with something very personal and unique to us. All the guests commented on how lovely and intimate the ceremony was, some even said it was the best wedding ceremony they had ever attended which meant so much to us. Brian’s warmth, fun, and easy going nature made us feel so relaxed on the day and the nerves soon went – we enjoyed every moment of it and our only wish is that we could do it all over again!”